


Take On Me

by SlySlyth



Category: The Last of Us, the last of us part 2
Genre: F/F, One Big Happy Family, Spoilers, my own conclusion to ellie/dina storyline bc that ending wasn't satisfying, only major character death mention is joel, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:08:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 9,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24948931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlySlyth/pseuds/SlySlyth
Summary: !!!Spoilers!!!My own conclusion to the Dina/Ellie ending of the Last of Us Part 2 because FUCK man.
Relationships: Dina/Ellie (The Last of Us), Ellie & Joel (The Last of Us)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 270





	1. Careless Whisper

Ellie looked at the white farmhouse that she had left behind a month and a half ago. She had been imagining this moment since she left California. She walked by the tree in the front yard and ran a hand over the carving. She remembered peeling the bark off. She remembered the smell of the hot sun as she looked at her pregnant Dina. Her belly bump protruding out from her brown t-shirt, as she took Ellie’s knife to carve the heart shape in the tree. She handed Ellie back the knife, who then carved ‘ D +’ under the outline of the heart. Handing the pocket knife back again Dina carved an ‘E’ completing the initials in the tree. Ellie smiled and grabbed Dina’s hips from behind swaying with her to a tune only she could hear. 

Ellie shook her head and continued into the farmhouse. As soon as she walked through the door she knew something was wrong and sighed, “Fuck.”. She knew the chances of this happening were impossible to avoid but had still hoped her little family would be waiting for her when she got back. _If she got back._ Ellie ran the two fingers of her left hand over the shelves by the staircase. She wiped the dust off on her pants and continued upstairs dreading what she thought was left behind. She opened the door to her studio and felt hopeless. She knelt in front of her guitar case and stared at the records she had played for her little potato, roughly tossing them aside in a momentary lapse of anger. 

She sighed, taking the guitar of the case. She sat on a box and tried to play somehow forgetting that she had lost two of her fingers on her chord hand. She picked a few notes and stood back up. She finally felt that after all the deaths, all the time hunting down that ox of a woman, she could finally say goodbye to Joel. She placed the guitar against the window sill and took out her journal. She sketched the guitar head and the window. Moths were flying from the guitar fingerboard and out through the window into the fields beyond. She eyed her work and then looked out the window. _Jackson._ It coursed through her. The place that was her home before....well, before Seattle. She wrote in her journal ‘Made it to the farmhouse. No one was here. Heading to Jackson to find my home.’. 

She closed the journal and stuffed it back in her bag. The walk would take about a day but that would give her time to think on how to say what had been storming through her mind since she let Abby go. It was all a mistake. She headed out the door of the farmhouse not daring to turn around for fear of saying fuck it and staying in the empty shell where her family used to be.  
She shoved her hand in her pockets and walked into the forest. 

She followed the path she knew by heart. Walking by her old hunting areas she listened for sounds of runners. She had made it about half a mile into the forest before hearing something ahead of her. She crouched instantly and grabbed her pocket knife from her back pocket. She didn’t make it this far back just to be killed a day from Jackson. She squinted and focused. There were 3 runners eating something. She paled. _Not Dina. Not JJ. Not Dina. Not JJ._ The logic side of her brain made her remember the dust. They had left a while ago and this prey was probably fresh. The panic side of her brain made her remember the basement. Running down the stairs and pounding on the door. Get the fuck up Joel! She shook her head and peered around the tree. One of the runners had gotten sick of whatever they were eating and headed to the right of the group. She went prone, shuffling on the ground, she found herself behind it. She went back into a crouch and then pounced on it. She bent its head backwards and jammed her knife into its throat. “Quiet.” She whispered to it as she lowered it onto the ground, stepped slightly behind her to position it on the ground. She turned the blade in its throat and sliced away from her as quickly as she could. She saw the coagulated blood from it spray the grass in front of her. She silently took out her bow and aimed at the closest one. She let an arrow go, sinking it into its head. The last one seemed to zero in on her as she let a second arrow fly. The runner plopped to the ground, writhing for a few seconds before finally being released of it’s second life. 

She quickly looked at the prey the runners had been feasting on. Just a deer. She sighed in relief, rubbing her hands on her arms,“Fucking gross.”. She made a face as she bent to pull the arrows out of the runners, stuffing them back in her bag and slinging her bow across her shoulder. Not as gross as the runners from Vegas. She shuddered with the thought. She had never met a pack of runners so desperate for live flesh before. Their flesh had been sunken in and the smell worse than bloaters.

She continued on the trail. She needed to get to Jackson before dark.


	2. You Give Love A Bad Name

Ellie eyed the gate and put her hands up. The sun had been down for a while but she didn’t want to stop to make a camp. The three runners were the only ones she had seen all day and she wasn’t going to let the sun going down stop her when she had a perfectly good flashlight. She needed to know if Dina and Potato were here and safe. She just needed to know. If Dina was truly done with their relationship, she would move on. Find some place new to call home. She felt the sadness wrap itself around her heart and shoved it down. Now was not the time for that. 

“Hey, I think that’s Ellie!” She heard a familiar deep voice. A light from up on the gate blinded her momentarily before she heard a lot of commotion. The gate was being opened, a few people were rushing out of the gate, someone had tripped and yelled fuck. Ellie cocked her head to the side trying to see past the light before she enveloped in a bear hug. 

“Heya kiddo. We’ve missed you.”, Maria finally let her out of the hug. Ellie was clearly uncomfortable with the contact but gave a small smile anyway. “We thought the worst. It’s been over a month. Come on let’s get you inside and get you some food.” A small crowd followed them inside the gate. You’d think she was the most popular person in Jackson. Ellie gave a small laugh and let herself be led in the gate. It wasn’t until the crowd dispersed and they were half way to Maria’s house when Ellie had to ask. 

“Did Dina come here? Is JJ here? Are they safe?”, Ellie just couldn’t wait any longer. She needed to know. They had to be safe. Her family had to be safe. 

“They’re here and safe. No need to worry.”, The older woman led Ellie to her house., “We have a lot of questions for you but it can wait until tomorrow when you’re rested. We’ll feed you here and then you can go back to your old apartment. Joel’s house had to be given to a young couple but whatever Tommy didn’t put in your apartment, he put it down in the basement.” Ellie nodded. They couldn’t have kept Joel’s house unused forever. She sat down at the table, shrugging off her backpack. 

Ellie looked at the wrapped sandwich Maria had placed in front of her. She quickly unwrapped it and greedily ate. She hadn’t eaten anything in two days and the weight she had lost since going to find Abby had been at least 3 fingers worth. 

“Your hand! Ellie, what in Gods name happened? Are you okay?” Maria grabbed Ellie's hand, causing her to drop her sandwich. Maria looked at them and they were clearly infected. Though not as bad as they could have been. 

“It’s fine. I cauterized it and wrapped it.” Ellie shrugged and retracted her hand from Marias almost vice like grip. 

“Fine but you will tell me tomorrow, yah hear?” She fixed Ellie with the most Mom-like look Ellie had seen her give. Ellie nodded, finishing off her sandwich.  
“So, my old place is still good to use?” Ellie crumpled up the paper wrapping and stood up. She grabbed her backpack up off the floor. 

“Yes. Did you want me to tell Dina that you’re back home?” Maria crossed her fingers on the table. Ellie shrugged. Gossip traveled fast here and Dina would probably know within a day or two that she was back anyway. 

“Would probably be better if she heard it from someone she trusts.” Ellie readjusted her backpack on her shoulder. The scars on her right shoulder were tugging her muscles weirdly and she didn’t want Maria to see it on her face. 

“Alright. I’ll come over tomorrow morning with Tommy so we can all talk.” 

Ellie nodded, moving a strand of hair out of her eyes and made her way to the door. She opened the door and walked the familiar path back to her old apartment. She paused outside the door and slowly pushed it open. The light coming through the window from the town made the dust particles in the air shine. She walked inside and glanced around. The bed had been made and her books and knick knacks had been organized. _Dina._ She sat on the bed and closed her eyes. 

_She wandered down the stairs in the farmhouse, JJ in her arms. He couldn’t sit up yet by himself and Ellie found it hard to be away from him when he was being so cute. He stuck a hand in his mouth and looked up at her._

__

__

_Ellie cooed at him, “My little spud.” and headed down into the living room area. She set him down on the play mat that Maria had brought over for them and moved one of the toys hanging above him. “You wanna play little potato? Or are you ready for a nap?” She glanced up and saw Dina leaning in the doorway. She had a dish towel in her hand and smiled so incredibly sweetly at the pair._

_“Do you mind going hunting tomorrow? We’re almost out of rabbit.”, Dina had really taken to the farmhouse. Ellie nodded at her, “Anything I can do babe. I’ll even try finding a deer.” She gave a small smile back._

Ellie opened her eyes again and stood up, walking over to her dresser. She pulled an old t-shirt out and glanced around. A guitar case and some jackets had been placed by her kitchen table. She walked over to them and with the old t-shirt she started to dust the table off. She couldn’t ignore Joel's things forever but it didn’t seem right to move them without visiting him first. 

She didn’t even notice the tears until she was done cleaning up half of her apartment. The dust was overwhelming and she was pretty sure she would just need to toss out the shirt. She threw it in a corner and ran a finger over the counter beside her, tapping a beat on it. “Okay.” She grabbed one of her jackets from her dresser and put it on. Slinking over to the bed she plopped on it staring at the wall across from her until she couldn’t think anymore. 

She woke with a start. The theatre still in her mind's eye, the blood on Dina still causing her to panic. The knocking on the door continued and gradually was getting louder. 

“Open the door Ellie.” 

Ellie stood up and stretched. She willed her heart beat to lower. Dina was safe in Jackson. JJ was safe in Jackson. She was safe on Jackson. She moved over to the door and opened it, two familiar faces looking at her. 

“Hey Tommy.”, She said quietly. She moved aside to let Tommy and Maria inside. 

“See you tried to clean.”, Tommy chuckled at her. He limped over to a chair and gently sat down. The chair gave a slight creak as he let his weight fully rest on it., “So, did you do it?” 

“You didn’t waste anytime.”, Ellie remarked, sitting in a chair across from him. Maria stood by the table, not wanting to sit. 

“Well, did you?”, He asked again, sounding impatient. 

“No.”, Ellie crossed her arms. “I found her and had her but couldn’t do it. I let her go. Killing her wouldn’t bring back Joel. It wouldn’t be what he would’ve wanted.” 

“That’s all I needed to know.”, Tommy looked at Ellie across the table. The scars that lined her face, her 2 missing fingers. ,“I’m just glad you made it back alive. Joel would never have forgiven me if I’d gone and gotten you killed. My grief made me angry and I shouldn’t have said what I had that day to you.” 

“It’s fine Tommy.” Ellie uncrossed her arms. 

“Dina’s been taking extra patrols. She’ll be back in town tomorrow.” Maria finally spoke and glanced between the pair. Ellie stood up and started pacing., “Extra patrols?” 

“She needed an outlet. She needed some way to stop thinking about you lying dead somewhere in California.” Tommy explained. 

“I need to see Joel.” Ellie went towards the door and quickly left, leaving Maria and Tommy behind in her apartment. She wandered through the streets trying to keep her head down.


	3. Ain't No Rest For The Wicked

Ellie looked down at the gravestone and sat down in front of it. She crossed her legs and placed her hands in her lap. 

“I fucked up Joel. I really did. I wish you were here to give some weird ass advice. I miss you and you know what happened in California....I forgave you. I still don’t understand why you would save me...but I do forgive you. Sorry it took me this long to get there. Maria won’t say it but she thinks I’m just like you. Stubborn, unyielding, but also loyal. I miss you Joel.” Ellie tugged at her shoe laces and wiped at her eyes, rubbing the moisture on her hands on her pants. She sat at his grave for a while contemplating. She couldn’t even play guitar anymore to remember him by. Or could she. She eyed his grave and stood up. 

By the time she got back to her apartment Tommy and Maria were gone. She sighed in relief. She didn’t have the energy to deal with more talking. Not until she could see Dina. She moved the guitar case leaning against the wall in the kitchen to the floor and gently opened it. She moved the guitar out of it’s case and opened the flap up inside of it. An extra pair of strings and the screwdriver they used to pull the pegs up lay inside it. She smiled to herself and set to work restringing it. The last guitar Joel made was black with a white design going up into the fingerboard. She ran a hand across it and popped the pegs. 

She sat with the restrung guitar on her lap with the fingerboard facing her right hand. She gently strummed a string with her left index finger. This would take some getting used to but it didn’t take her too long to figure it out with her right hand before. She made a G chord as best as she could with her right hand and set to work practicing for the next couple hours. She soon tired of it and went to her backpack, digging out her weapons and supplies from her journey home. 

She set her weapons on the nightstand beside her bed. Her bow was shining in the sunlight and as she placed her pocket knife next to it she jumped back. The deaths of the couple in the aquarium seemed to never want to let her rest. She buried her face in her hands and sat with her back to the bed.  
_  
“I didn’t even know she was pregnant.” Ellie sobbed in the bed beside Dina. The peeling wallpaper behind her love coming in and out of focus. “I wouldn’t have...I didn’t... I’m not...”_

_“Shhh.” Dina gently shushed her, wrapping her arm around the smaller brunette and pulling her in closer. “It’s over Ellie. You’re safe and I’m safe. Feel..” She moved Ellies hand to her stomach where the baby seemed to be angry at them both for being awake this late. “You didn’t know she was babe. Just stay with us and it’ll be okay. We’ll find a way to live with Seattle.”_

_Ellie nodded and kept her hand on Dina’s belly. She gave her a small kiss and tried to relax, her crying slowly coming to a stop as she listened to love fall asleep beside her._  
  
She opened her eyes and turned back around facing her backpack. She picked up her journal and grabbed her pen. She sketched Dina laying in bed with the wallpaper peeling. Under it she wrote ‘The couple keeps appearing in my mind. That could’ve been us. I need to find a way to move on from it. I need to find myself so I can get you back. If you’ll take me back.’ She drew some moths around the page, zoning out in thought. She ran out of room on the page faster then she thought she would. She closed it and opened the drawer of her nightstand, stuffing it inside. 

She would wait for Dina to get back from her patrol and then would wait with baited breath to know how much damage she had done. She would get better. She would be better. Not just for Dina and JJ but for herself. So she could be happy again. 

She moved her backpack and sat on the bed, fumbling through the cards she had found in California. How ridiculous it seemed to her now. Searching for these cards that didn’t mean anything. **Brain: 89 Braun: 45** The card read, she threw them at the wall. Then quickly sighed and retrieved them from the floor, sliding them into her underwear drawer on her dresser. 

She glanced out her window and looked at the shadows from the trees and buildings around her. It was only midday. She left her apartment and headed for the tavern. She walked through the commons and said hi to those who prompted talk but walked with purpose. She opened the door and stepped inside. It was pretty packed but she figured it was lunch time and those working on the gardens and in the shops would need to eat. She went and sat on a barstool waiting for Eric to come over. When he finally did he brought her a beer and went to fetch a sandwich. 

“All on the house.” He told her. “Not often you get to serve someone who has returned from the dead.” 

“Haha very funny.” She had retorted. She gorged on her food and chugged back her beer. She kept thinking about Dina. Wondering what patrol she was on and who she was with. JJ was probably with Jesse's parents. They had come by a lot after he was born at the farmhouse and Dina always commented on how it was nice to feel like she had parents again. She tapped her fingers on the bar remembering the way Dina always seemed to smell like lavender and sunshine. She stood up from her barstool suddenly overwhelmed by all the people but instead of running out like she wanted too she calmly walked out, telling Eric, “Thanks” as she left.


	4. Livin' On A Prayer

The night seemed to take forever and by the time Ellie had laid down for the night she had to massage the fingers on her right hand. She had taken the time to sketch JJ how she remembered so when she saw him next she could see how much bigger he had gotten. She missed her family. She even missed the sheep and that was saying something. Dina had begged her to take in the small herd they had found when getting the farmhouse ready for them to move in.  
_  
“Babe, put the photo of us on the shelf by the staircase.” Dina called from their bedroom upstairs. Dina had set about reorganizing the way Ellie had put their clothes away claiming it was too chaotic. Ellie had just lightly rolled her eyes and smiled before being ushered out of the room for a ‘surprise’ later. She heard the bedroom door latch close and a room she wasn’t allowed in yet open._

_“Okay. Where do you want the picture we found outside of Seattle?” Ellie called back. They had found a well preserved picture of a field of flowers that Dina decided they just couldn’t live without. She chuckled remembering how excited Dina had got when Ellie had bundled it up and stuffed it partly in her backpack._

_She went and set it on the pile of things they needed to find a home for on the kitchen table. She looked around at the baby toys people had forced on them and picked up a little elephant. She turned it over in her hand and placed it back down. She never thought her life would turn out like this. A small family. A good sized farmhouse. She was supposed to die and yet here she was trying to live._

_She slowly made her way back towards the stairs._  
  
She stared at the door half expecting Dina to come marching in telling her the sheep had gotten out or something but rubbed at her face. She needed a walk to clear her head. She hopped off the bed and headed out the door. Mindlessly walking was better than doing nothing she decided. She wound through the town walking from the commons to the south gate and then around the east side of town to the north gate. She looked up at the sound of horses and a familiar voice. 

“Don’t let Shimmer have too many apples.” A feminine voice quipped. “We really had to rush to get back before tomorrow and she pouted the whole time.” Ellie glanced around the edge of the stable and saw her. 

Dina had mud all the way up from her boots to her waist. “Dina.”, It came out a whisper but whatever God had forsaken Ellie had allowed her to hear it. Dina’s brown eyes found Ellies green ones and for an instant Ellie thought she saw relief and love. But then Dina’s eyes looked angry and dark. On instinct Ellie took a few steps back not really knowing where she would run to and avoid the wrath that was soon going to follow. 

Dina turned back to the stable hand and handed over the reins to Shimmer. She quickly moved out of the barn and rounded on Ellie but enveloped her in a tight hug then quickly stepped back and slapped Ellie with all the force she could. Ellie went down to the ground holding her cheek in her hand. 

“Glad to see you didn’t die in Santa Barbara.” Dina said coldly. Ellie had never experienced this distance from Dina before. She stayed sprawled on the ground as she watched Dina walk away from her and down into the commons. 

“Well, that’s a start.” Ellie tenderly touched her cheek and stood up. The people stationed to guard the gate were clearly trying to hide the fact that they saw the slap but Dina had hugged her. She had touched her. Which was more than she expected to be honest. So, there was hope. Ellie smiled to herself as she headed back to her apartment to play around on her guitar. Dina would find her when she was ready to talk.


	5. Take My Breath Away

It had been a few days since the slap and Ellie could still feel the weight behind it on her face. She picked at her guitar and after almost non stop practicing could play a few very basic songs. It was taking a lot to rewire her brain for it but in the end it made her feel better to have a goal to work towards. She strummed a few chords and sighed. The strings were still making that god awful noise that meant she wasn’t pressing them completely into the frets. She sighed and stood up to put it back in its case. She went to her kitchen sink and turned the tap on, splashing her face with the water before shutting it back off. She heard a shuffling outside her door and eyed it warily. 

A light knock came from the door and Ellie called out, “Come in.”. She didn’t feel like walking to it. She went and sat on her couch as the door slowly opened. She heard from the couch as whomever it was gently closed the door behind them. 

“Ellie?” Dina softly called from the door. 

“In here.” She responded just as quietly. Dina rounded the corner and Ellie had to remember how to breathe. Dina had her hair up in a ponytail and was sporting the usual black pants but was wearing a grey flannel with it instead of the usual brown shirt. 

“Hey.” Ellie said upon remembering how her words work. She hadn’t seen Dina in what felt like 10 years and was starved for the attention only she could bring. But she remembered the slap and the anger behind it and stayed put. 

“We need to talk.” Dina grabbed one of the chairs from the kitchen table and pulled it into the living room area. “I didn’t think you would be back. I thought...we all thought that you had died.” 

“I almost did.” Ellie conceded. The Rattlers were the most sociopathic group she had run across and what they did to people was indescribable. She had almost died 3 times at their hands but never underestimate someone with a goal. 

“Did you find what you were looking for?” Dina had a nervous gaze that was mixing with apprehension. 

“Yes.” Ellie answered shortly. “Was it killing Abby? No.” 

“So let me get this straight. You left behind your family to kill this woman and you didn’t even kill her. You broke my trust, you wouldn’t even wait to talk about it until morning, and you didn’t even kill her.” Dina sat back in the chair and crossed her arms. Her eyes narrowed and Ellie could see the anger and hurt that was there. 

“I made a big mistake leaving you but I had to. I didn’t see what I needed to learn until I had her head under that water. Killing her wouldn’t bring me the peace I sought after. Killing her wouldn’t erase Joel’s death. Killing her, would’ve killed me also.” Ellie felt the guilt from leaving bottling up but she also felt the resentment towards Abby finally go. That weight was gone and she felt she could breathe again. 

“I don’t trust you anymore Ellie. How are we supposed to be a family if I can’t trust you.” Dina seemed to be pleading with herself more than Ellie but Ellie understood. She knew what she needed to do to get her family back together. It would be a long battle and a lot of self searching but she would do it. She would do anything for Dina. 

“Let me earn it back. Let me prove to you how I’ve changed. Let me show you.” 

“I asked you to show me then. I asked you to stay-”

“I couldn’t. I needed to learn this lesson the hard way.” Ellie interjected. 

“Was it worth it?” Dina wiped the tears that were falling from her face as she stared at Ellie, sadness over taking the gorgeous chestnut brown of her eyes. 

“If some God I don’t believe in gave me the choice to do it all over again. I would do it the same.” Ellie said resolutely. 

“I will try Ellie but my God if you break my trust again...” 

“I won’t. Let me show you.” She held out her left hand then slowly retracted it when Dina didn’t put hers out. “Can we rebuild our friendship first? And see how we feel after that?” Ellie would try anything. She would do anything. 

“I think I can do that. I can try to build up a friendship again.” Dina nodded after thinking for a few minutes. 

“Okay.” Ellie leaned back on the couch and let out a huge breath. Dina didn’t say anything else as she left. The door softly clicking behind her. 

Ellie looked out the window to her right. She needed to start doing something again. Anything. The basement. She needed to see the basement. All her flashbacks started there.


	6. I'm Still Standing

Ellie looked at the resort house. She breathed in a deep sigh, the anxiety already settling in. She climbed off her new horse Rover. He was a lovely dark bay horse. Had a slight temper from what Ellie had seen so far but they got along. She went and opened the garage door, pulling Rover in behind her. 

“Stay here Rove. I”ll be back when....I’m done.” She closed the garage door and turned back toward the house. “Fuck.” 

The back of her neck was sweaty. Her shoulders were tense. 

_She ran down the basement stairs and slammed her whole body against the door. “Joel!”_

She ran a hand through her hair and headed into the house. She reflexively went for the pocket knife in her back pocket, seeing the ghosts of those she had killed in the shadows of the rooms. She headed towards the stairs to the basement. She looked down and the stairs seemed to be endless. Taunting her. She took one step down and flipped open her knife. 

_“Joel!” She could hear someone hitting him. His grunts and moans of pain filling the stairwell._

She took another step down. 

_Dina crouched on the floor in front of Ellie and took her hands. “You’re safe babe. You’re safe. We’re home.”_

Ellie took a third step down the long stairwell. 

_“Joel!” She yelled from her art room in the farmhouse. JJ started crying in the other room at the sudden loud noise._

She braced for another step. 

_She was running frantically trying to get the stairs and tripped, Dina’s face coming into view. She kept seeing Joel's smashed face over Dina's. “No! Fucking get up!” She tried to stand but was being held down._

“Only 3 more steps.” She told herself. She quickly walked down them and walked through the basement door frame. She glanced around and held her knife out waiting for someone to jump her. 

_“Get the fuck up Joel!” She struggled against the people holding her down._

She looked down and saw the faded black from the blood stain where she had been knocked down. She shuddered remembering the pain after Dina had shaken her awake. 

She walked around the room avoiding that one spot. Not looking at the one spot until it was unavoidable. Finally she glanced at the faded blood from Joel. The dark black against the wood. 

_The muscled woman brought the golf club up and smashed it down on Joel’s head. Blood was going everywhere._

Ellie jumped back and tripped over her own feet. She slid back against the floor and tried to remember how to breathe. She crumpled on the floor in a ball. Looking towards the spot and then looking back. Every once in a while seeing Joel still laying there. 

_“NO!” Ellie screamed. The group was fighting over killing her. They mentioned Seattle. They mentioned their group. They mentioned how much they wanted Joel gone. They hit her in the head so hard she blacked out._

The sun had gone down an hour ago and Ellie had managed to get herself upright and was sitting across the room from the spot, her knees curled into her chest. She was still staring at the spot even though the room was pitch black. She finally seemed to come out of her fog and turned her flashlight on, not moving from her spot, knife in hand. 

“Come on Ellie. Come on.”, She said to herself. She inched closer to the spot. Humming a song as she went. It was one she had been writing in her journal since Joel's death. She had finally reached it. She looked down and tentatively put a finger on the spot. 

_“Joel!”, She was running down the stairs again._

“No!”, Ellie yelled out loud, willing the flashback away. 

“No.”, She said more evenly. Almost as an afterthought. She put her whole hand down on the spot where Joel had laid and closed her eyes. 

_“You’re safe.”, Dina had her hair up._

_“You’re safe.”, Dina looked tired, her hair in a messy bun._

_“You’re safe.”, Dina said crouched on the ground in front of her in her nightgown._

_“You’re safe.”, Dina gently said setting JJ down and wrapping her in a hug._

Ellie’s eyes flashed open. “I’m safe.” She backed up from the spot and laid down under the desk in the room.


	7. The Sound Of The Crowd

Ellie slowly opened her eyes. She could hear the birds outside chirping away. She crawled out from her spot under the desk and when her eyes fell on the spot she kinda froze. She could feel the dark trying to wrap itself around her again but remembered Dina. Remembered all the times telling her she was safe. She leveled her breathing and found it was easier to get out of it herself. She smiled to herself and headed toward the stairs that led back into the house. 

She grabbed a granola bar out of her backpack and quickly ate it. She headed toward the garage and paused at the door. She could hear Rover moving inside and gently opened the door. She walked over to Rover and gave him a few pats. “You do alright last night? I did.” 

She opened the garage door and smiled in the morning dew. It was pretty early but the sun had some heat to it. She grabbed Rover’s reigns and hopped up on his saddle. She moved his reins and had him do a small trot heading out of the gated area of the house. She started to head back to Jackson. 

She went down the path and the hills, watching for runners but mostly looking at how the sun hit the trees leaving rays of sunshine that led to the grass below. She saw a few deer run by and listened to how their hooves hit the rocks in the creek that was nearby. 

“Good boy.” She said to Rover. He was a good jumper and she didn’t even really need to tell him where to go. They got back to Jackson quicker than she thought they were going to. She hopped off Rovers saddle and walked him back to the stable, not saying much to anyone. 

She went to walk back to her apartment but found her feet were carrying her towards where she thought Dina was. Before she could even tell her brain no, she was knocking on the door to a white two story house. 

“Coming!” Dina called out. Ellie could hear JJ talking in baby babble in the background. Her heart swelled at the sound of him. The door opened and the pair stared at each other. Dina closed the door behind her and stepped onto the front deck. 

“You okay Ellie?” Dina was trying hard not to show the worry she felt in her eyes but Ellie knew her too well. “I heard from Tommy that you went to the house.” 

“To the basement, yeah. I feel...better.” Ellie smiled, feeling her smile reach her eyes. “I just wanted to thank you. I realized while I was sitting in that room that you’ve helped me through a lot of the flashbacks. You ground me and I don’t think I ever thanked you for that. For being there. So thank you.” 

Dina cocked her head to the side in thought for a moment. Her head straightened and she nodded. “I love you Ellie and I just wanted you to be happy.” 

“Well, thank you.” Elle’s eyes shot to the door as JJ’s wails could be heard. I love you too. She didn’t feel right saying it back yet. She hadn’t earned it.

“That’s my call. I’ll see you Ellie.” Dina eyed her one last time before slipping back inside the house.

“Yeah..” Ellie put a hand on the door and turned around. She headed toward the tavern, smiling to herself. 

She pushed open the door and instead of the usual crowd there were only a few people inside. She eyed them spotting who she was looking for. The blonde woman was sitting at the bar, sipping on a drink and chatting with Eric. Ellie sat next to her and nodded at Eric. 

“Hey Maria.” Ellie tapped a finger against the bar. 

“Oh hey there.” Maria took a drink from her cup and looked over at Ellie. 

“I need work to do. Any patrols or anything?” Ellie looked at the glass set in front of her by Eric. 

“Well, we need a guard for the south gate tonight if you wanna do that.” 

“Of course I will.” Ellie smiled at the older woman and took another sip of her drink. She handed the rest of the cup to Maria. “I’m not too thirsty. Just wanted to see you.” 

“Alright.” Maria took the cup and poured some of its contents into her own cup. She set it back on the bar and watched as Ellie left the bar. “Haven’t seen her smile since that party.” She shook her head, chuckling to herself. 

\--

Ellie walked down to the south gate. She had a pistol holstered to her leg and a rifle strung across her shoulder. She had brought her backpack out of habit and was regretting it slightly. She must look ridiculous going to the gate with a backpack but it comforted her to know it was there. 

“You finally showed up!” One of the guys on the top of the gate teased her. 

“Yeah, yeah Max. Well, I’m here now.” She started up the ladder to sit up with him. He was a pretty tall guy with big muscles. His beard was groomed and he always had a comb in his back pocket. The light from the search bounced back off of the trees and grass ahead of them and made the scar across his cheek shine in the glow. He had ice blue eyes and brown hair that was so dark it made it look black in the winter. “Any runners yet?” 

“No but our patrol this morning spotted a small group headed this way. We’re hoping they go south before they hit the river. Small groups are never a problem but larger groups sometimes follow.” He looked back out towards the forest. 

“Know what you mean.” She nodded at him and turned her gaze as well. “Any signs of survivors?” 

“We found a small camp about 3 days west of here but they didn’t wanna join up. Said they were headed towards Boise to find some family.” He checked the chamber of his rifle. 

“Shit. Hopefully the QZ in Boise held up. Though I doubt it. We went above Boise when we were headed to Seattle.” She looked to the right side of the gate. She thought she heard something but it could’ve just been the wind. 

“No kid-” She heard it before she saw it. Max hit the floor, a hole where his right eye should’ve been. She crouched down as a bullet went for her. 

_Of course. The one day I go do something out of my apartment. Fuck me._ She glanced down the ladder, the bell was already being rung but she heard gunshots coming from the North Gate and shouts from the other guards around her. 

She peaked her head up above the top of the wall and narrowed her eyes listening. She heard a twig snap to her left and the sound of someone reloading to her right. She quickly popped up with her rifle, aimed, and shot to the right. She heard someone scream out in pain and fall to the floor. She went back into a crouched position and tried to move over Max’s body to get a better angle. 

She listened again, tuning into her surroundings. Shuffling to her right. Even more movement to her left. She peaked above the wall and quickly had to lower herself again. A few bullets hit the wall slightly to her right. _These people must have a death wish._ She positioned her rifle and stood, firing two shots, and then lowering herself again. She heard two thumps against the ground and then some people shouting in the trees. 

“Retreat!” A voice called from behind the trees. She could hear movement and stayed crouched. If they were smart they would leave and never come back. She heard the grass and twigs crunching from further away and relaxed against the wall. Her eyes traveled back to Max’s body and she sighed. He had just gotten engaged to a young woman who worked in the blacksmith. She prayed no one else had gotten hurt.


	8. It Takes Two

Once the all clear had been given she quickly climbed down the wall and headed for the two story house. Dina. JJ. She frantically knocked on the door. It swung open and she couldn’t hold back. She gripped the woman in front of her in a hug. She smelled like lavender and sun. 

“Ellie?” Dina sounded worried. “You weren’t...oh god you were the one who took that shift.” She wrapped her arms around the smaller woman and held her. 

“They might be coming back.” Ellie finally let go of Dina and took a step back. “I just had to make sure you were safe.” 

“I understand. Did anyone..” Dina couldn’t seem to get the words out. 

“Yeah, Max. One shot is all it took.” She shuddered slightly, the hole in his head coming to her mind. 

“Come inside. You shouldn’t be alone.” Dina looked at her expectantly. She was waiting for the breakdown. She was waiting for Ellie to fall apart again and she would but she learned she could pick herself back up. Dina was always the strong one and now, Ellie needed to be for herself. Ellie shook her head in response. 

“No. I need to go make sure no one else got hurt. I’m fine Dina. I’ll be okay.” Ellie retreated off the porch and headed at a sprint towards the North Gate. Dina watched her run from her porch and smiled. Ellie really was trying. She could see that. 

Dina went back inside the house and headed up the stairs. She peaked into JJ’s room and sighed. This kid could sleep through anything. A woman came out of the room adjacent to JJ’s and looked at her. 

“Everything alright dear?” The woman had dark hair and brown eyes and every time Dina looked at her she could see Jessie in her brow and eyes. 

“There’s been some trouble at the gates. I need to go check on everyone.” Dina opened the hall closet and grabbed her pistol and holster. 

Ellie got the North Gate and saw chaos in front of her. The stables had been lit on fire and 2 people were laying on the ground helpless. She ran towards the burning stable and slid under a fallen piece of the roof. They had gotten half of the horses out but the rest were still trapped. People were shouting and she could hear people trying to throw buckets on the parts of the walls engulfed in flame. She undid a few of the gates closest to her and watched the horses run out into the front of the stable and out the stable main entrance. 

She continued further into the stable kicking down burning stable doors when she couldn’t open them and opening the ones she didn’t need to kick. She reached the end of the stable when the smoke was finally becoming too much for her. She crouched against the wall and coughed, going prone against the dirt below her. She tried making her way out of the stable coughing along the way. She went under a few burning long pieces of wall and went into a crouch to try and maneuver her way out of the stable. She reached the opening at last and crawled forward. She coughed hard and her lungs felt like they were on fire. Someone grabbed her and pulled her the rest of the way out. She glanced around at the people and looked beyond them at the North Gate. The gate had been destroyed during the skirmish and the nearby shops and homes looked ransacked. 

She slowly sat up and watched as the stable started to come down. Still coughing she tried to stand and was back on the ground instantly. _Too much smoke, not enough oxygen._

Maria crouched beside her. “Good god girl. Don’t you know how to stay out of the fire.” She handed her a canteen filled with water. Ellie drank most of it and laid on the ground sighing. 

“There were only 2 horses I couldn’t save.” Her voice sounded harsh and weak. “They distracted the south gate. Took 4 horses from what I could tell.” 

“And took some food and medicine.” Maria nodded while watching Ellie drain the last of the canteen. She took it back and tossed it to someone behind her. “Refill it.” She ordered. 

Ellie stared up at the stars as she lay there. She coughed into her hand and looked at the soot that she had expelled into her hand. “Fuck.” She said to herself. Her voice didn’t even sound like it belonged to her. Fucking smoke. She finally sat up and the pain in her chest hit her full force. 

“Oh fuck Ellie.” Dina crouched beside her. “We need to get you home. Maria, what medicine do we have left?” Dina had heard Maria talking to the crowd. 

“I’ll go check but get her home and keep her awake until I get to you.” Maria looked between the two women, a small smile tugging at her lips.


	9. Total Eclipse Of The Heart

Dina helped Ellie back to her apartment. She opened the door and with Ellie's arm slung around her shoulder she helped her over to Ellie’s bed. 

“Stay here while I get you new clothes. Yours are...well, burnt.” Dina shuffled over to the dresser across from the bed and started going through the drawers. She pulled out some sweat pants and a new shirt. “Why do you always do this? Run into the fire. You couldn’t just...let some of the people we have trained to do that...do their jobs?” 

“They weren’t helping. They had froze up. The horses were suffocating.” Ellie coughed. The more she coughed the more her chest hurt but didn’t feel quite as heavy. “Thanks.” Ellie grabbed the bottom of her shirt and raised it up over her head. Dina stared at her. She had new scars all over. A nasty one of the right side of her ribs and some smaller cuts and what looked like a bullet wound on her right shoulder. 

“What happened in Santa Barbara Ellie?” She asked quietly. She watched as the brunette changed clothes and grabbed her burnt outfit and stood to throw it away. There was no salvaging it. 

“This group tried to capture me. The rattlers.” She coughed and regained control of her breathing. “They chained up people who tried to escape and kept clickers and runners in a pit to throw people down into.” She paused to breath as Dina brought her over some water. Dina’s disgust was written all over her face. “I found Abby and that kid she travels with now. They strung up on these pillars. Hands tied above their heads. A little tiny platform to stand on. I cut em down. We headed to some boats.” Ellie took a sip of the water and coughed again, wiping her hand on her sweat pants. 

“I made Abby fight me to save the kid. I threatened to kill the kid.” She shook her head in shame. “We fought. She bit off my fingers and I almost killed her. But as I went too I just...I remembered Joel. Sitting on his porch playing his guitar. Remembered him asking if you were my girlfriend. It was after the party at the chapel and I just couldn’t do it anymore. I let her go. Revenge is over fucking rated.” She rasped. She coughed and drank more water finally looking up at Dina. 

“Shit. That’s intense. Fuck those people but I’m glad you let her go.” Dina eyed Ellie's hand and went wide eyed. “I didn’t even notice your hand. Did a runner do that? Your guitar...” Dina looked down at the floor. The overwhelming depression that she would never hear Ellie play again made her choke up. 

“No, no. That was Abby too. During the fight. I can still play. Bring me my guitar Dina, I’ll show you.” Ellie sat down her water on the end table to her left and watched Dina leave and come back. The guitar was handed over and Ellie positioned it how she had finally become used to. 

“See look.” Ellie rasped. She put her right hand in the spot for the Bm chord. She played a few notes and with her raspy voice started to sing. 

“Talking away, I don’t know what I’m to say  
I’ll say it anyway,Today’s another day to find you  
Shyin' away, I’ll be coming for your love, OK?

Take on me (take on me)  
Take me on (take on me)  
I’ll be gone  
in a day or two” Ellie coughed and stopped playing, putting the guitar down on the bed beside her. Dina wiped the tears from her eyes, the love she felt for Ellie overpowering her rational thought. She stepped forward and knelt in front of her. Ellie moved her right hand to the back of Dina’s neck. Dina moved her hands to Ellie’s hip. For a moment all they could hear was each other's breathing. Dina moved forward, Ellie moved forward in anticipation. 

Then the door banged open as Maria came in carrying several bottles of medicine. They quickly jumped apart. If looks could kill the look the pair of them gave Maria would’ve killed her on the spot.

“Oh sorry, did I interrupt? Just thought you’d want this life saving medicine as soon as I could get it to yah.” Maria smirked at the pair and set the bottles down on the dresser. “Take this one once in the morning. It’ll help your lungs. Take this one at night. It’s an antibiotic. It’ll help yah sleep and keep infection at bay. At least that's what Roger said.” 

“Thanks Maria.” Ellie rasped. Dina turned around and grabbed the antibiotic. She opened it up and fished out a single pill. “Any left I’ll take back to him.” She grabbed the pill from Maria’s hand and swallowed it, sipping some water after. She squinted her eyes as she felt the pill go down her throat and laid back on the bed. 

“Can I talk to you Dina?” Maria had already started heading towards the door. Dina followed her annoyed about the interruption but also grateful for the medicine. 

“I talked with Robin and Carol. They’re gonna be watching JJ for the next two weeks. Stay here and help her. We all know how she is. She’ll be trying to hop on a horse tomorrow if we don’t make her rest. Stubborn just like Joel was.” Maria shook her head and smiled. She quickly returned to a frown. “I got people to go see. I’ll come by with a bag for you tomorrow.” 

Dina nodded. “She definitely is stubborn. I’ll give you that. See you in the morning then.” Dina headed back inside the apartment annoyed that Maria had made her stay away from her son. Even if she understood why. 

“Ellie?” She called out softly. She got to where she could see the bed and heard Ellie snoring softly. Dina smiled and went to move her so her head was laying flat against the bed.


	10. Epilogue

Ellie looked at the tree in front of the farmhouse. Her hands were full of JJ’s clothes and toys. Thankfully the furniture hadn’t been damaged while they were gone. She smiled to herself. 7 months ago she didn’t think they would be moving back here and yet here they were. She looked down at the onesies in her arms and the little shorts and shirts and felt content. She headed inside seeing the bookshelf by the stairs once again covered with their gathered knick knacks. 

“Babe?” Ellie didn’t know where she had gone but assumed it had been upstairs somewhere. She headed up and stopped in front of the bedroom beside the master room. She looked inside and saw JJ standing up waddling towards one of his toys on the floor. He had started walking 2 months ago and she thought he looked like a cute little dumpling trying to get his bearings. 

“Hey there my little spud. You looking around?” She came into the room and set down the clothes on top of the dresser. She moved the toys in her arms to his toy box on the floor and scooped him up. “I got something to show you.” She readjusted him on her hip. He was getting heavy. Pretty soon she wouldn’t be able to hold him anymore. She went around the various stuffed animals on the floor and headed towards her art room. She opened the door and stood inside for a moment. Last time she was here wasn’t sure she would ever be back. She wandered inside with a squirming JJ in her arms. She bent down and shuffled through some boxes finally finding what she had been looking for.

“This is a picture I sketched of you and Momma when you were just a little tiny spud.” She held up the paper and watched as JJ stared at it. “This-” She held up the watch that used to belong to Joel. “-will be yours when you’re old enough. It belonged to your grandpa Joel.” She stood back up and set the watch down on her desk. She left the room and closed the door with a soft click behind her. JJ was really starting to squirm and to distract him from being picked up she started tickling him. She walked with him back into his room, his squeals of delight echoing throughout the house. Ellie set him down and turned around, finding Dina in the doorway. 

“Thought I heard some giggles up here.” She teased. She stepped forward wrapping her arms around Ellie’s neck. Ellie went into the embrace and put her nose against Dina’s moving her to the side. She giggled as she captured Dina’s lips in a kiss fully enjoying the moment. 

“I love you Dina.” 

“I love you Ellie.”


End file.
